Claiming Dibs

It turns out that a Dutch ex-pat will soon be relocating from Osh to Jalalabad. This news was relayed to me by Vanessa who has met this man and claims that he is "nice." After giving the information, V then proceeded to claim dibs and, even though I have never spoken to or seen this man in my life, I immediately became extremely defensive. "I'm sorry, did you just say 'dibs'?" I couldn't keep the sarcasm out of my voice. "This is a person we're talking about, not a sweater at a JC Penny sale." V then sheepishly retracted her dibs, at least vocally and I felt weirdly placated. Is it the lack of available men that is making us so crazy? I mean, claiming dibs, getting pissed about someone claiming dibs . . . what does it all mean? And why should I care if V claims dibs anyway? I'll probably meet this Dutch ex-pat, this "nice" guy, and find that, in the way of the Dutch, his jeans are too tight and his shirts a little too stylish to be considered attractive by any self-respecting American girl from the West Coast. Give me baggy jeans! Give me t-shirt over t-shirt! Give me beenies! Anything but style. I wouldn't know what to do with a Dutch man and his french fries dipped in mayonaise anyway. If I ever meet this "nice" guy, I will probably make some Pulp Fiction joke about 'Royale with cheese" and he will think I'm lame. What I'm getting at is that I'm a little ashamed for making V retract her dibs. If she wants him, she can have him. Unless, of course, he looks like Jude Law. Then it is every girl for herself.